How Our Family Safely Took A Road-trip
& Why This Time Might Just Be The Best for
Your Family to Travel Together
In late June, around the time when California was starting to see a second surge in cases, a moment when I was starting to see a decrease in sanity in the household, and the period when the cops who killed Breonna Taylor still hadn’t seen the inside of a jail cell, (still going) I began feverishly searching for a temporary escape hatch for me, my husband, Mark, and our three kids, aged 7, 6, and 4.
But where to go? We didn’t really want to get on a plane, keeping three kids away from germs while flying or in the airport was going to be a feat. I knew California was a hotspot and the beaches were either too crowded or too expensive for something on or near the water, so that was a pass So at around the same time the current administrations radical “police” force started looking into Oregon, I did too, but for a much different reason.
Below is a recap of the precautions we took, what worked, what didn’t, and how it was the best thing for our family during this tumultuous time.
BOOKING
Nothing too exciting here, we used Airbnb to find a place. The challenge was finding a place that had what we wanted, cause apparently we were not the only ones with the idea of an Oregon Coast escape. Eventually, Mark found a great house, complete with a hot tub and a sauna THAT I STUPIDLY NEVER USED in the quiet town of Gearhart, on a golf course (lost on me) and with views of the ocean. SCORE! And this oasis was just up the beach from where they filmed The Goonies (as everyone in Oregon told us). So it was planned, and, in 80’s movie terms, we took a break from “Groundhog Day” to go on a “Vacation” to the “Goonies”.
In 80’s movie terms, we took a break from “Groundhog Day” to go on a “Vacation” to the “Goonies”.
The other aspect of booking for a 15-hour drive was an overnight hotel stay. This and bathrooms, and specifically navigating them during “the germs” as our family refers to COVID-19, were my biggest concern. So I searched which hotel chains were the best in terms of cleanliness amid the top roadside chains like Holiday Inn Express, Hampton Inn & Suites, etc. I came across several great articles about what to look for in a hotel and specifically in the room to make sure it has been thoroughly cleaned. In this article from USA TODAY, I learned of the new hotel industry best-practice for cleaning called SAFESTAY, a certification that helps to ensure guests the hotel they have selected has achieved the highest levels of cleanliness. I settled on a Holiday Inn Express Inn & Suites just of I-5 in Redding, CA. I called and spoke to a really awesome and patient front desk agent who answered all of my questions about the cleaning procedures and secured a first-floor room for my family, as I figured no time in elevator or stairwells would be safer.
THE DRIVE THERE & BACK
We got by with a little help from hand sanitizer,
Kindles, Mary Trump, and being present.
The Luggage. So I did something I never thought I would do, bought something I used to dread as part of my family vacations when growing up. I bought a car carrier. DADDING TO THE EXTREME. But look it was inevitable: 3 kids and a dog that weighs as much as the three of them combined, food for the trip there and back, and clothes, toys, etc. dictated the need for more space, even in my rather large SUV. I found one that I thought looked really cool from Thule, but was $500 +/-. Then I found one from SEARS, which is still open, who knew?! It was black, matching the color of my truck, and was 1/2 the cost of the Thule one. Plus it held all of our luggage, beach towels, beach chairs, and didn’t really cause any drag on the car. It actually looked okay and was a far cry from the goiter-looking versions of the late 1990s.
Kid Kits. I wanted to give each of my kids a little bit of autonomy on their trip, which they really loved. I took their under-used lunchboxes and packed them with essentials:
three of the toys they wanted to have in the car
their own bottle of sanitizer
a backup mask
a few of their own hand-selected toys.
In addition, on the morning of the trip, I packed each of their blankets, Kindles & headphones, new reusable water bottles, and a package of sanitizing wipes. “The germs”, as I said, were the biggest concern for us in taking this trip, so we were super prepared to fend them off as best we could.
The Doggo. With the exception of barking at our doorbell and our next-door neighbors for no great reason, we have the most chill dog. Brian is a huge 100-pound lab and he really just wants to be around us, so the past 6 months have been a gift for him. He repaid that gift by being the most relaxed passenger on our trip. We gave him a cozy blanket on the flat-floor of the folded-down seat in the third row of the truck. I packed the exact amount of food in two different bags, one for the house and one for each of the two 2-day car trips. He was able to go to the bathroom at rest stops. And he just kind of slept or entertained whichever kid was in the car seat next to him.
The Drive. This was effortless. The kids were in love with the expanded screen time, which was actually expanded at the beginning of quarantine, so they were thrilled to plug in. Occasionally, I would point something out cool to the kids, and they responded with “ooohs” and “aahs”, which I thought was great because even though they were connected to their Kindle, they were also present. But, on one such occasion, I checked the rearview to see my 6-year old looking down at his screen, not even lifting his head, affectionately saying “That’’s so cool, Pop!”. I was being appeased. “Look Kids, Big Ben.”
The Food. This part was tricky, but not for the kids or Mark. Stopovers at McDonald’s, which is not a regular for us but which did have a plethora of safety precautions, didn’t require us getting out of the car, and provided new toys as entertainment, contributed to - as my daughter said several times - “the best day ever”. But McDonald’s doesn’t serve grilled chicken anymore, and after our trip to India last year, I stopped eating red meat. So at these stops, I opted for a large black iced coffee and an ice cream cone (which is only like 100 calories and a 1 gram of fat btw). So i supplemented that with protein shakes. And Twizzlers. And a few bags of Reese’s Pieces. So anyway health wasn’t a priority on the drive, ok?? But the KIDS were happy, with the Happy Meals and a cooler full of Honest Juice Boxes, some of their favorite fruits, and a separate small bag of dry-food snacks.
The Bathrooms. While these are always tricky on interstates, we were of course extra cautious about cleanliness now. I found some sanitizer room spray, that was kind of like a mister, which helped. I also took a can of Lysol, sanitizer wipes, and hand sanitizer in for each trip to the bathroom. Luckily kids don’t have to go as much as adults for some reason, so it was mostly me and Mark that were braving the banos. One gas station, in particular, was MUCH cleaner than the others, ConServ Fuel. This link will take you to the list of all their locations in CA to help plan any road trips. This place was super clean, organized, had Purell hand-wash and sanitizer in the bathrooms, it had disposable gloves for you to use when pumping gas and just felt really fresh and clean, which is at least a placebo effect of safety. And their gas was seemingly way cheaper. I really liked this place. Probably talked about it too much, TBQFH.
The Hotel. As mentioned, we opted for the Holiday Inn Express. The room was big enough with two King or two Queen beds and a pull-out sofa. The room was heavily cleaned, felt sanitized, and the sheets for the pull-out were in a sanitized bag so it felt extra safe. We still sprayed the hell out of the place with Lysol, so it felt extra safe. Because it was overnight, we were doing a lot of driving, and the kids are so young, we weren’t bugged with sharing one giant room, but “suites” with a separate bedroom would provide time for us to decompress and watch TV after the kids fell asleep. The plus, though, was that. we could have fallen asleep super early. But on both occasions (the drive there and the drive back), we were under a room of people that kept MOVING and TALKING. The walls and in particular ceilings in this hotel are super thin. I called the front desk at one to see if there’s anything they could do (Ok, Karen.) but, they were rightfully like, well… no. I kind of laughed at my request and was able to crash, but it is one thing to keep in mind if you also opt for the first floor.
You can see a lot from your car.
We were fortunate enough to drive through some of the most beautiful parts of California and Oregon, and even into southern Washington. We saw a LOT without getting out of our car. From the beauty of the Shasta Dam, Lake Shasta & Mt Shasta, to the incredible redwood forests and the just plain GREEN of Oregon, it was a pretty majestic drive, even on the I-5.
On the way home, we were toying with adding a few hours to the trip to see and show the kids San Francisco, Big Sur, and the CA Coast between SF and LA. At first, we decided against it, but this is where Mary Trump came to the rescue. About 30 minutes after heading home from the house we rented, we played the Mary Trump book on Audible. 7 hours and 5 minutes of the drive FLEW BY, and I found us just north of Napa by the end of the day. “Too Much and Never Enough/ How My Family Created the World’s Most Dangerous Man” was RIVETINGGG. So if you only book a trip to trip out to this book while on the road, DO IT.
“Too Much and Never Enough/ How My Family Created the World’s Most Dangerous Man”
Get it On Audible For A Great Drive
Big Sur
Anyway… CA. After a stopover in a Holiday Inn Express in Napa, sans wineries, to the slight but inaudible dismay of my husband, we headed to San Francisco. My kids were most excited about the fact that Sonic went to visit there, and we got a chance to see the Sonic Tower (Trans Union building) from the car. That, a socked-in-fog Golden Gate Bridge, and a drive down Lombard Street accounted for a few memories for their first trip to San Francisco. We continued driving on through Monterrey and into Big Sur, a place I always find too hard to leave.
We stopped at an empty cliff-side lookout point, one of few without throngs of people, and were able to snap a few pics.
BEING THERE
“It’s not the destination it’s the journey”… but the journey is a lot tougher with three kids and a dog in the car. We honestly had a great experience in the car and the kids were saints. BUT, being there, really BEING there, at our destination, was the biggest and best part of our journey. It was helpful we were staying an idyllic location with ocean views and really quiet surroundings. But that would have been moot had we really not taken advantage of the forced time to hunker down, versus using it as a landing pad for a bunch of mini-excursions.
With few exceptions, we really did not venture from the house or the beach. Our trips included:
a daunting, outdoor mini-golf outing, stocked with gloves, sanitizing balls and clubs, and a perfectly timed 4-year old tantrum complete with laying down on the 17th hole
a quick drive-by trip to the actual town where the Goonies was filmed,
another quick drive-by trip to the cute but quarantined town of Astoria, followed by a jaunt across the majestic bridge that connects that Oregon town to the state of Washington
nightly outings to a magical place that only exists in the town of Seaside, OR called Dairy Queen (or so we told our kids).
Other than that, we stayed in or went to the beach. The beach was viewable from our windows but was around a mile walk to the actual water. It was fun, but the kids got a bit wiped on the way back, so we opted to drive ON THE BEACH - so cool - and set up shop most days. It was also great because the weather was 65 and sunny but windy on most days, even in mid-July, so the car also helped act as a windshield. This was also a dog-beach, so Brian got tons of energy out.
SAME BUT DIFFERENT. We honestly didn’t change much of what we do at home, with the exception of stepping away from work almost fully, save a few calls, and my leading a few meditation and coaching sessions. But the change of environment was a big part of the change in our stress levels. We still ate dinner together every night. We still took actions to and racism, including calling the police in KY to demand the release of the 87 protestors who sat peacefully on AG Daniel Camerons lawn demanding justice for Breonna Taylor. One of us still went to the grocery store. We definitely watched less TV and the kids didn’t use their Kindles the entire time we were there. My screen time went down a lot, too. Because we were detached from being in the monotony of “stuck at home”, we sang more, did more Hamilton dance parties (the kids are obsessed), and read books. It was like being on vacation 20 years ago.
A FEW OLD THINGS BECAME NEW TRADITIONS. The house we were staying in had a lot of games and activities, which also increased our connection while being disconnected from screens, news, etc. Yahtzee was great at helping our youngest son learn numbers, giving our oldest son and daughter a chance to practice addition, and giving me a chance to practice patience. The house had ping-pong, tennis rackets, cornhole, and a train set for the kids to build and play with. So when we weren’t at the beach, we were always doing something and doing something together.
THE NET
I am so grateful to have a family, this family; for the means with which to travel during this crazy time; and for the opportunity for our family to be present and connected. I’m also damn grateful for the change of pace. As a kid, my parents took us on a road-trip beach vacation every year. There were years that featured an overnight hotel stop on the way down, and a huge oceanfront house to stay at when we arrived at our destination with other family members and friends. And there were years when my parents were both laid off, we had very little money, we traveled through the night in a car with no A/C, and crammed into a smaller, yet still oceanfront, house on the beaches of North Carolina. Know what I liked better? Neither. They were both equally joyous for me as a kid, filled with many happy memories, laughs, Twizzlers, and rooftop car carriers, and I can’t imagine my childhood without these trips and memories. This is why it was so important for me to get us all out of town and doing something fun and exciting.
At the end of the day, being on the road was much less daunting than I thought. And, being together as a family and connecting on a vacation - this time from the purview of a parent - was much more rewarding than I could have ever imagined.
Check out some pics of our trip below, just like an 1950’s slide show from an annoying neighbor.
