A week of social justice is unfolding in front of our eyes and ideally, in our hands.
There are so many voices right now. So many important, thought-provoking, action-taking, inclusive voices right now. Are you LISTENING to those voices?
If you are black, I am sorry. I am sorry for the injustices bestowed upon you by generations of white people and by policies and institutions created to ensure that racism stays intact in order to hold you down. I am hopeful and active in working to end racism. I will falter and I will make mistakes, but I will not give up. I will not give up for you, for George Floyd, for Emmett Till, for Tony McDade. I will not give up for my three children, my three beautiful Latinx children who are only filled with love, because I want to see them grow up and to see them grow up in a world free from hate and racism.
If you are a non-black person of color, I am listening and aware of the pain you experience too, from racism to police brutality. And I am sorry.
If you are white - I hope this week has made you uncomfortable. I hope this week has made you question what to do. I hope, if you live in cities as I do, that you felt unsure if it was safe to take your kids out to play.
That uncomfortable feeling is called WHITE PRIVILEGE, and it’s only one form of the societal plague upon which this country is founded. Regarding racism, because of the color of our white skin, we only have to feel uncomfortable when being confronted with the fact we have been either complicit or active in ending racism. If we’ve been either racist or antiracist.
Those feelings we as white people may be experiencing this week only pale in comparison to the feelings POC experience EVERY DAMN DAY. For example,
If you’re white, this week you might be saying: “I’m afraid to say the wrong thing because I would end up offending someone”. But if you’re black, that statement is “I’m afraid to say the wrong thing because I might end up dead.”
If you’re a white parent, this week you might be saying: “I’m afraid to say take or let my kids out right now” But if you’re a black parent, that statement is often“I’m afraid to let or take my kids out every day.”
If you’re white, this week you might be saying, regarding the conversation to defund police: “I won’t feel safe if there aren’t any police.” But if you’re black, that statement is often “I don’t feel safe if there ARE any police.”
If you’re white, this week you might be saying, “I feel paralyzed on which actions to take.” But if you’re black, you might be saying “I CAN’T BREATHE.”
And those things you might be saying if you’re white and if you’re liberal/ progressive /aware. If you’re someone who says things that start with “I’m not racist but…” well, I propose you immediately follow up that phrase with the only three words that make sense: “YES I AM.” And your next action could be to take the following list as a starting point to change your thought process and actions.
So the good news: You’re Uncomfortable.
Why is it good news? Being uncomfortable is fixable. It’s fixable by taking action. Here are SOME of the actions you can take. In a 2016 Inc. Magazine article, Chris Dess listed 7 steps to getting comfortable being uncomfortable. I’ve adapted those for purposes of working to end racism.
Start - Start actively looking for ways to not only BE an Antiracist but to also actively transition your friends, family and workplace into Antiracism. There are books like How to Be An Antiracist by Ibram X Kendi. which we are reading in the Get Real Good Book Club and White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo, PhD. Look at BLM, NAACP, M4BL, Color of Change, or the multitude of social media posts and information that are out there. Do the work. Look it up. DO NOT ASK YOUR BLACK FRIENDS TO START THE WORK FOR YOU.
Don’t Quit - If we quit, we surrender to white privilege. Don’t give up. Do something and do it often. Take a break, take a meditation, take a moment, but then, get back to work.
Push Yourself Past Your Comfort Zone - This is 3rd for a reason - once you start and you don’t quit, you’ll get to a part that gets really comfortable. Mindlessly signing petitions? Pick up the phone and call the numbers. Feeling bored with calling, donate. That’s not enough? Then visit your local police precinct to ask questions. So just as important as it is to get comfortable getting uncomfortable, it is important to CHOOSE to get uncomfortable when you find yourself comfortable once again.
Embrace the “Suck” - invite it in. This will be particularly helpful if and when you are confronted with a choice you have made that is upsetting to your friends and family or total strangers who are persons of color. Or, worse, shown to be racist. Embrace the learning, make the amends, continue moving forward with the best of intentions, and armed with more knowledge.
Be Around Like-Minded People - this is somewhat easier to do now, COVID notwithstanding, because there are protests and sit-ins - it is a vibrant time. How do you do that after the protests slow down, provided they do? Surround yourself with like-minded people. Start your own book clubs on literature that moves the needle. Join the groups mentioned above and others that will allow you to stay up to date on ways to get involved but also volunteer with them.
Recognize Your Improvements - notice the improvements you have made in your journey to end racism and notice the progress the movement has made. Celebrate it. Then get back to work and do it more. Share your excitement with your peers to get THEM to start taking more action.
Rinse and repeat - self-explanatory
I want to one other point: HAVE UNCOMFORTABLE CONVERSATIONS WITH YOUR WHITE FAMILY AND FRIENDS. Share with them what you have learned and what you want them to learn. Share the list with them and ask them for their help to end racism, because it is your turn to end racism. It’s up to you.
Happy Birthday Breonna Taylor, Rest in Power
Rest In Power, George Floyd